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Fourth Sunday of Easter, May 7, 2017, by Fr. Kevin Anderson

Remember at the start of Mass, I asked you to share about a scar you have? Well I have a scar story for you.

 

As you recall, two weekends ago I was gone from here. I was attending a workshop for leading Men’s Retreats down in Arizona. It was great long weekend experience out in the desert. Well, after the workshop, I spent some time in Phoenix, Arizona. There, a couple buddies of mine talked me into going kayaking in the only lake of Phoenix. It is a human-made lake named Lake Pleasant.

 

So on a gorgeous 80 degree day, we are out on rented kayaks and I’m my swim-trunks and flip-flops. (Now remember it is a desert), but one of the guys decided to stop on a little island and explore. So I follow him (with my flip-flops) and on a rocky ridge, I slipped off my flip-flops and stepped onto a cactus! That’s right! It was as painful as it sounds, for it was a cholla cactus (also known as the Teddy Bear Cactus or jumping cactus) and I stepped right into it and the whole cactus arm stayed right with my foot.

 

So may have noticed that I have been limping a bit. Well, after my buddies pulled off the cactus head, I pulled out a few long spikes. Then a buddy (with needle and tweezer) pulls out around eight spikes, then with TWO doctor visits here in Princeton with doctors pulling out another 15 spikes . . . I am still limping.

 

So yea, I got scars. I got a limp. I’ve got pain.

 

But I can imagine that nearly everyone here could tell us a story of having a pain. Maybe it is a physical pain (like I have). Maybe it is an emotional pain (because something tragic has happened in your life). Maybe it is a spiritual pain (like feeling God has let you down). Whatever it is . . . we all have pain.   Many of us feel stuck in our pain.

 

I have been reading a new book lately. It is called OPTION B, by Sherly Sandberg. The subtitle is “Facing Adversity, Building Resilence and Finding Joy. I highly recommend it. In the book she quotes Psychologist Martin Seligman found that three things stunt our recovery from pain (or setback, or a loss of any kind). They each begin with a “P”:

-personalization, the mistaken belief that we are at fault for the pain. Now that is true in my case, but most often that is that true. That’s when someone feels responsible, such as “If only I . . . “ That’s the bad notion that you are responsible for whatever bad event event happened . . . a death, an accident.

-pervasiveness, the mistaken belief that this event will affect all areas of your life. That now because of this certain pain, all the other aspects of your life are ruined. There will be no more joy anywhere else. Everything’s ruinded

-permanence, the mistaken belief that the aftershocks of the event will last forever.

That you will always feel rotten. That things will never get better or that you will feel normal again.

 

In the second reading from St. Peter, he reminds us that Jesus didn’t just “sail through life.” No, he suffered, he was insulted, he carried wounds! And remember that in a different gospel (the one that you heard when I was attached by the cactus); Jesus comes back from the dead with his wounds. He has scars. He invited doubting Thomas to touch the nail prints and put his hand into the scar on his chest. Did you ever think about that? Jesus could have come back fully healed and scar-less. But he doesn’t.

 

It’s as if to say “Hey, I know that you also carry many scars. I know that bad things have happened to you. I know that you have done some bad things. I not only know what it is like to have suffered, I also know what it is like to carry around the scars.”

 

In the Men’s Work that I do, we say, “If you do not transform your pain, you will always transmit it.” That is, you will keep passing it on . . . e.g. as a bully at school, as a tyrant at work or to passing on “craziness” to your kids or friends.

 

In the gospel for today, Jesus says, “I am the gate. I am the doorway.” That is to say there is hope. That you can transform your pain, your scars. How? Well, I have 5 five (and remember you can always get a copy of the homily in the kiosk. And the homily is taped so that you can watch it again at our parish website or on our parish phone ap.) Here’s how:

• think differently. It can always be worse. “Yea he died, but he could have collapsed while driving and killed also killed someone.”

• become thankful. Recognize what you have and what it going right. When you are down, make a “gratitude list.” Each day, add a few more things to be thankful about.

• open up more. You don’t need to be a martyr or a saint. Just be real. You are not perfect and you don’t have to be perfect.

• let yourself be loved by God. I mean, God made you and God knows everything that you have said or done. And all God wants is to wrap you in loving arms and say, “It’s OK.”

-get back to Church. That means physically coming to church for some of you. For others, it means paying attention at Mass. That is, actually listening to the words and lyrics and prayers. It is being fed throught the Eucharist. But also important is being supported by the community. One of the greatest resources that exist in all of humanity in a community. Here . . . I don’t care where you are from, or how long you’ve been coming here, or whatever to you that somehow you feel like you don’t belong. We are here . . . to laugh together, to cry together, to break bread together, because YOU ARE NOT ALONE. That person right around you ALSO has a scar.

 

And Jesus has a scar (actually a lot of scars). And Jesus says, “Come into the gate and find rest and realize that God will never, ever leave you.” And just as he said at the end of the gospel today. “I came so that you might have life and have it more abundantly.”

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