Can you think of somebody who is pretty cool? I think that the desire to cool has been around forever. It certainly was a quest back when I was in High School. And I know that it is still here today at all our area schools. Did you know that we have kids from the parish who attend nine different High Schools?
Well, there was a song, by a pop band called Echosmith that was a hit recently. It still plays on several radio stations. The song is called COOL KIDS.
[Mo sings/plays the refrain]
The song says, “I wish that I could be like the cool kids. ‘Cause all the cool kids, they seem to fit in.” It is an amazing song because it talks about something that all of us probably want (or wanted) but nobody is sure how to achieve it.
Oh there are tips out there on how to be cool . . . like “be confident” and “don’t try too hard” and “go against the norm” Yet, I can’t tell you how many tears have been shed by young people who just want to “fit in.”
There was a study done some years ago on self-esteem, they found that:
85% of Kindergarteners have a high level of self-esteem
20% of 6th graders have a high level of self-esteem
5% of 12th graders have a high level of self-esteem
Maybe it’s because, people get hurt as they get older. Classmates can be cruel. And so our self-esteem gets lowered. School, at any age, can be difficult. Now don’t get me wrong, I think that we are blessed with great schools in our area . . . and have some outstanding teachers, aids and staff. But the reality is . . . lot of kids want to “feel cool” but don’t
I would guess, that anyone who actually thinks that they are cool, probably aren’t. And we probably have people who don’t think that they are cool, but others would. I think it all comes down to the fact that we all have wounds (physically, mentally, spiritually). We all have flaws. I have been a priest for 32 years, and I still haven’t met a person who is completely satisfied with their bodies. All of us want: more here, or less there.
We want to be taller, thinner,
have more muscles or more hair.
Many of us do a great job of pretending to be “more than we are” when we are really feel less
“put together” than we admit.
The place of the wound is the place of the healing.
The place of the break is the place of the strength
Perhaps that is why in the stories about resurrection, like the one we heard today, Jesus appears with the wounds still in his hands, in his side and in his feet. He even tells Thomas to touch these wounds. They are real. They are physical wounds, but perhaps they are also emotional wounds . . . for these were Jesus’ trusted disciples and they abandoned him, rejected him, denied knowing him. Jesus, the risen, the Savior, the Messiah, the Prince of Peace, the King of Kings . . . still had his wounds.
Let me tell you a story. Once upon a time, a great samurai warrior, with two great swords hanging from his belt approached a monk and said, “Tell me, holy monk, about heaven and hell.” The monk looked up at him and said, “I cannot tell you about heaven and hell because you are too stupid . . . and ugly.” With that the warrior became enraged and drew for one of his swords. The monk looked at him and said, “Your rage, my friend, is hell.” Struck by the power of his words, the warrior dropped to his knees and bowed his head. “And that,” said the monk, “is heaven.”
You see we all have recordings in our head that remind us of our woundings, “You’re stupid, you’re a loser, you are not good enough, you are not man enough, or woman enough.” We all have fears.
We have all had times when . . .
we have trusted and felt betrayed,
the times when we loved and were rejected,
the times when did we best and were laughed at.
When Jesus shows his wounds, it’s as if he is telling the disciples, “We have all been wounded. You’ll be OK. Don’t fear. You are not lacking. Trust God.” He says, “Peace be with you.” Perhaps we are invited to accept our wounds and not hide them . . . but not to believe them. Our wounds do not define us!
Perhaps we are invited to be transformed by them . . . that is, to let our wounds teach us: not to create situations where anyone feels as we did, but to make this world a better place. And maybe someday we can even laugh about them or brag about them, because someday we realize that God has been with us all the way.
And whatever the wound . . . trust that it can become a holy wound that changes us. To let God work through us. To let God’s mercy touch us . . . and allow God’s mercy to reach others through us. And then to realize that we don’t have to be cool . . . just be real.
Oh and by the way, there was a study done at the University of Virginia about cool kids. It found that as the “cool kids” grew in adults,
they had 45% higher rates of alcoholism and drug problems 22% higher rates of criminal behavior
and their ability to positive relationships as adults was 24% lower.
The study suggested that as cool kids get older, behaviors that once impressed their friends don’t have the same effect. So they turn to increasingly extreme measures to get attention.
Ugh? Or maybe they just never faced their wounds.