[Hold up the paper heart] Did you know that if you cut out a tiny piece of a heart, [tear off a small piece] it would continue to beat all by itself? The heart is an amazing thing. Many people consider it THE most important organ in the body.
We use the word heart to mean many different things . . .
a big heart or a heart of gold: said of someone kind and loving
a heart of stone: said of someone without sympathy
bleeding heart: said of someone who is excessively generous
cross my heart: said as an oath to assert one’s honesty
eat your heart out: said mockingly to express the desire for them to suffer;
young at heart: youthful
I would say that the woman in the gospel had a generous heart. That is, she gave of herself. Notice that the other people in the gospel also gave . . . and they gave even more than her. But she gave all that she could, she gave so as to trust God fully. I give my best, I give my all . . . and I trust God that you will take care of me.
Giving of one’s heart can be difficult, for hearts can be broken. There is a saying that goes, “Don’t break someone’s heart because they only have one, instead break their bones… they have 206.”
A heart can be broken in many ways . . . not being honest, lying, cheating, stealing. But the most difficult way is when there is a death. For many people it is as if a heart is ripped apart and can never be mended. [Rip the paper heart into 2 pieces]
Those who have lost a loved one, often feel as if their heart has been ripped apart. They experience grief.
Grief is never the same for people. There is no normal way to grief. And most of us don’t like to grieve because it hurts and it feels like being “out of control.”
Well there are a couple of things that you can do with grief. This goes for anyone who has experienced a loss of any kind.
- Name it, don’t deny it. “Yes I am hurting. I miss that person.”
-Attend to your healthy life habits. Don’t neglect them . . . drink your water, eat your vegetables, get enough
sleep, exercise.
-Become connected to something beyond yourself. Connect with something, or someone beside yourself.
For example, go volunteer, go help someone else out. Give of yourself
-Bring yourself to God. Don’t hold back. Give God your all (just like the woman in the gospel). Continue to
tell God exactly what pain, or worry or burden you are carrying. Give God your all . . . all of your
anger, your emotion, your joy, your trust.
Grief can be rough. Sometimes feeling that is even impossible to “go on.” But none of us grief alone. We grieve as friends, as family and as a community. For it is the collective ache that we hold as sacred. For it is the group support that says, “Yes, this is tough. Yes, it doesn’t seem fair. Yes, I am not sure why or how anything makes sense anymore.” But the group response is to “bring it to God.” Don’t hold the pieces of a broken heart, instead bring them to God, be honest with the pain, the loss, the confusion. We can’t mend a broken heart, but God can.
That is the power of the Eucharist. For we believe that every time we celebrate Eucharist, that is break bread together, we do so with all of those loved ones who have gone before us. We don’t celebrate this alone. We celebrate it with the saints, the “not-quite saints” and all those in between. For the power of the Eucharist brings the pieces back together . . . in hope. In assurance that the story doesn’t end with the brokenness.
So in just a bit, we would like to remember and honor all those who have died in the past 12 months. We can’t mend a broken heart, but we can cry, and laugh, and remember and together trust in a God who promises life. The story never ends with pain. But we must give of ourselves, like the woman in the gospel . . . give all that we can. And trust God.
I heard of a saying about grief . . . Grief, is really just love.
Grief is all the love you want to give but cannot.
Then all of that unspent love gathers up in the corners of your eyes, the lump in your throat,
and in that hollow part of your chest.
Grief is just love with no place to go.
So I will now read off the names of those from our parish who have died since last November.
When you hear the name of a loved one, please come up and light a candle for them.
Life does not end with death, it only changes.